Saturday, September 15, 2012

The eyes of others

Do you see me? Do you really see me for who I am? What do you see? Do you see I've finally come into my true self, nearly fully having reached the acceptable – acceptable to me, that is – levels of manhood in my own eyes? Do you see? What do you see? Do you know me? All those years of pain trying to be someone I actually felt I wasn’t spilling out in rage and anger over small injustices. Fuelling my negative anger, pushing me forward, nagging me. Never letting me relax. Now here I am, fifteen months into my transition, a happy, balanced, quirky, but oh loving man, surrounded by his close friends and community who love him and accept him, even if at times they do find him a little too quirky. But most of all, finally relaxing. Finally taking that waking breath in the morning, immediately feeling so happy, the time and space where every day is a gift. Serenity. Happiness. Serendipity. Love.

What do you see, the eyes of others, I wonder.

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