Friday, October 19, 2012

Онол номер 22: мэдрэмж ба үйлийн үр

Мэдрэмж ба үйлийн үрийн холбоог хүмүүс ойлгодог уу? Би өөрөө сайн мэдэхгүй ч нэлээд бясалгасны дараа өөрөө ойлгосноо хуваалцахыг хүсэв. Зүрх сэтгэл, оюун ухаан, сүнсийг чинь өнгө, хөгжмөөр дүүргэх тэр л мэдрэмжүүд чинь альтернатив, энэ бодит байдлаас өөр бодит байдлыг үүсгэж байдаг. Ядаж л тэр ертөнц бий болох боломжийг нээж байдаг. Мэдрэмжээ дагасан ч бай, үгүй ч бай ямарваа зүйлийг хайрласан чинь, хайрлаагүй чинь үйлийн үр үүсгэж байдаг. Мэдрэмж, зөөлөн хэрнээ очир мэт хатуу сүнсний бүжиг. Тэр бүжиг хааяа бидний амьдарч буй ертөнцөөс илүү бодит ертөнцийг мэдрүүлдэг. Мэдрэмж нь тэгээд үйлийн үрийн үндэс. Ямар нэгэн зүйл хийсэн ч бай, үгүй ч бай.

Хөлд салхи орчоод хоёр сар болж байна. Тайван байдлаа алдсан нааш цааш холхих миний бие сэтгэлийн минь хөдөлгөөнийг толины тусгал мэт хуулна. Зөвхөн тэрний хажууд л тайван. Яах ч ёсгүйгээ мэдэх, мэдрэх өр зүсэм. Земфира, чи агуу шүү, чиний дуунуудгүйгээр энэ үе минь аялгуугүй байх байсан. "Энэ хайр оддыг зорьсон пуужин, энэ хайр торонд хашигдсан гал" Тюрийн Брэйкс гэж их лаг мэдрэмжтэй хоёр залуу байна, Ирландын фоок рок хамтлаг, би блогтоо өмнө нь хоёр дууг нь оруулж байсан. Ийм л байна. Түр баяртай.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Theory number 22: feelings, karma, etc.

Does anyone understand the relationship between feelings and karma? I wish I could, I've my theories nonetheless. Feelings, as they arise filling your heart and soul with music and colours, create an alternate reality, or at least a possibility for an alternate reality. Feelings, whether you act on them or not, create a karma of attachment or detachment. Feelings, those tender, but diamond-hard tentacles of soul movement, are sometimes more real than the reality we inhabit. Feelings are the foundation of karma. Whether you act on them or not.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

The slayer

The slayer of hearts. The slayer who loves, above all, and who is loved. The gentle assassin, me. Unwitting victims from afar, hearts hemorrhaging, morphing into words, spilling out in music and colours. The gentle assassin whose only fault is his limitless heart.
Time to dot the "i"s. Time to breathe and write again, to revel at the small, victorious discoveries. Time to recuperate. Time to love, again. Soon.

Friday, October 5, 2012

Acceleration of the universe, etc.

Never been fond of mathematics, much better of physics, but the childhood fascination with astrophysics and cosmology continues on: I find myself these days genuinely wanting to study quantum physics, at least to the extent of self-improvement. Incredibly fascinating, the little facts of life such as that the universe is accelerating and expanding, that there is surely a correlation between the finite energy, the way quarks interact, and the infinite parallel universes multiplying at neck-break speed. The last few times I've been in love, I'd romanced weather, skies, and now, stars and galaxies. It's fairly normal, isn't it. Acceleration of time is what's happening in my world: I'm acutely aware of every day, of each night, of every hour, while at the same time I seem to be suspended in no-time zone. Suspended, I cling to ordinary routines: going to bed at the break of dawn, with numb brains and screaming fingertips, the dear face in my head, waking up with still that one only face, screaming heart, and numb tongue, act as if nothing has changed, but so much has changed and still is changing... Because the universe is expanding, my own.

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

...

Sometimes people hide their feelings as it's easier to deny them and pretend they're not there rather than face them and be honest about them. As long as it's not hurting anyone, silence is fine, although most of the time silence does hurt someone or the other. Striking the balance between silence and non-silence is essential for the full expression of one's feelings.

Crowdfunding!

As many of you know, we are doing an online crowdfunding for the first time in the history of the Centre, and it happens to be for the Equa...