Wednesday, January 1, 2014

Art, artists, and more

I need a body, an individual, an artist to inspire me to the extent of visualising my inner world that's already bursting to go visual. A muse. An artist committed to his/her art so much so that their every breath, their every sigh, their every heartbeat is a challenge and a brave new world for me. All I know is I can't find them here. An artist whose body itself is an art. Not your 5-dollar, beauty-canon magazine body, either. From quite a young age, I resorted to writing to get my emotions out, but my emotions are way too visual by now to just leave them on paper or a computer screen. With my little toe dipped into the visual creativity, I know I want to make movies, and not at all the ones that will garner following or red carpets (fuck you, my one-night stand!), but the ones that will viscerally echo and imprint deeply in people's souls... Before I leave Mongolia, I will make one, this time a feature homage to the LGBT rights movement here, the one and only poetic homage that I will ever make that will show a queer youth's world as they experience their identity and the queer community. The storyline is ready since last July, I just need some collaborators. And then, it's a goodbye. To know that it's time to move on for good is bittersweet. To be saying goodbye with every moment to my first, karmic home of becoming is heart-wrenching, all that I've been occupied with since last night...

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