Monday, December 28, 2015

love, energies, etc.

all we are is energy. all we emanate is also energy. so with love (when it's truly the feeling of love), it is almost palpable because it engulfs you, wraps around you, it's always almost warm. sunny. urgent. when you are loved, you always know that you are loved because their energies never leave you, they are all around you, even when the person is not next to you. when someone truly loves you, you inevitably feel whole and fuzzy, sometimes even too full. love, when it's true, it lulls you into a feeling of safety because you are protected by that invisible but strong shield of energy that will never let any harm come to you. when you are with someone who loves you, and if you're well attuned, you feel their soul movements, their energies. those soul movements come and touch you sometimes as strongly as physical acts (well, yes, i think i've had soul-level intercourse with someone, a few times). love is so strong that you feel their every soul movement and it's almost like it's your own. when love is mutual, you never need to talk. you are finely connected on so many levels that speech is extra. you spend hours just feeling your own and their soul movements. when someone loves you truly, it's beautiful because your energies dance their own dance while you both stay immobilised and utterly entranced with that harmony.

when you are loved, truly, you feel it. because love is energy, and all energy, when it's dense and strong, is tangible.

having done a ritual to reclaim my energies tonight, i will continue it for the next however many days it takes to fully take them all back. for i no longer can afford to be sucked off energetically by someone who treated me so appallingly while claiming to love me. that was NOT love. it was incredible, the lies, the pretenses, the falsehoods... all the while, it was my love that he mistook for his own. no longer. reclamation of energies needs to be accompanied by cleansing of those energies, all i felt from my energy when it came back was this mad anger and restlessness... needs to be cleaned.

i already feel much better. much, much, much better. i should've done it ages ago. stupid me, always believing words, negating my own gut-feeling. no more.

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