Monday, February 29, 2016


i wake up. as soon as i do, lucy comes running and tries to come into bed with me, reminding me that she's a soul that loves me, that needs me. her purrs shake the bed.

i wake up. to the reality that it's time to leave. to go. to leave all this shit behind. i can no longer be the man people wanted me to be. i can no longer sacrifice myself for the greater cause that i had dedicated my life to. now all i need is peace. love. time to go.

endless disappointments. endless fucked-up situations. this time, it's only the soul-movement matter, but it reminded me again that i am so fed up with everything. if i could un-exist despite what it will do to my community (honestly, we would not have gotten here in terms of LGBT rights without me, rob, otgoo...) but personal costs are high, people never get it.

it's time i left. this time, for good.

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